Does anyone else ever feel manipulated by the press when it comes to salacious celebrity headlines? “Pop icon Britney Spears was spotted yesterday dealing crack to toddlers. Pause. Watch Britney on CBS’s How I Met Your Mother, Mondays, 8:30 eastern.”
Now obviously I use Brit Brit in jest, since her media whoring past means she can now garner press for such riveting activities as going to the dentist or buying jeans. Not to mention that she has less and less to promote these days. But how do you feel about these five celebrity viral stories that seem to conveniently coincide with upcoming promotions?
1. Christian Bale
On July 18, 2008, Warner Brothers released The Dark Knight in North America. Not to say there wasn’t enough “dark” hype already surrounding the movie after Heath Ledger’s untimely passing in January. But four days later on July 22, 2008, Christian Bale’s arrest for assault was all over the news. It was later reported the arrest happened in Britain where you can apparently be arrested for “verbal assault.” Against your mother and sister. Really? Some guy yells at his mother and this is what makes headlines? They’d wanna be at my house when I’m tired and renege on a bedtime story promise to my son. Anyway. “See Christian as Batman’s alter ego, Bruce Wayne, in The Dark Knight. In theatres now.”
2. Kanye West
I know that I’m a suburban, stay-at-home mom whose iPod is filled mainly with George Michael and Billy Joel so that it can’t be a shock that prior to September 2, 2005 I had never heard the name Kanye West. But I sure as heck knew who he was after he stood there next to Mike Meyers on the Katrina telethon and made his “George Bush doesn’t care about black people” comment. All I had to do was turn on CNN. Suddenly even a white, middle-class, soccer mom would be familiar with this rapper if she came across his album, Late Registration, which just happened to drop two days before on August 30, 2005.
3. Tom Cruise
You knew I’d have to include this one. Who could forget Tom Cruise waxing romantic about his new relationship with Katie Holmes on Oprah? Even spiritual guru Eckhart Tolle knew he was “the one who jumped on the couch.” Yes, Tom was a busy boy during May and June of 2005. Promoting War of the Worlds for its release on June 29th, you ask? If by promoting a movie you mean professing his (questionable) love, jumping on couches and spewing venom at Matt Lauer and Brooke Shields, then yes. Mission accomplished.
4. Alec Baldwin
There was a while in the early 2000s when I felt like I heard Alec Baldwin’s voice everywhere. From movies to SNL to guest spots on Friends and Will and Grace, it seemed like I couldn’t get away from him. That was when I had a two year old son who was really into Thomas the Tank Engine. Max would be engrossed in the adventures on the island of Sodor and I’d be thinking, Oh my god, I even hear that Schweaty ball voice on Treehouse. Now I’ve really lost it. But none of this prepared me for April 19, 2007, after TMZ posted “Alec Baldwin’s threatening message to daughter” complete with the recorded tirade. I had become accustomed to Baldwin’s voice talking to children about Percy, Henry and Sir Topham Hat. Not screaming “thoughtless little pig” and vowing to “straighten your ass out.” Baldwin was more ubiquitous than ever. Just in time for the April 26th season one finale of 30 Rock.
5. David Hasselhoff
As someone who’s had the experience of partaking in a Mojito or five and then having someone take out a camera (you did delete those, right Jenn?) I kind of sympathize with David Hasselhoff. Maybe a snapshot of someone on a Girls Only Weekend seemingly slumped inanimate on a kitchen table yet still conscious enough to hold one arm up heroically in the air (again, deleted, right?) is not the same as a video of someone lying drunk and minimally clothed on a floor eating a cheeseburger in front of his daughter, but still. After this video was released to the media on May 3, 2007, I made a mental note never to buy my children a video camera. Then I tuned in on June 5, 2007 for the season two premiere of America’s Got Talent. I had to see if the Hoff managed to stay sober during the obligatory sappy back story and subsequent singing/dancing/fire eating/burlesque number. I know I find it hard.
They say there’s no such thing as bad publicity. You tell me – am I too cynical and jaded? Is it wrong that as soon as I heard Stephen Page was busted for cocaine possession that I wondered when the new BNL album was being released?
Thursday, August 7, 2008
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 reasons for living:
I can comment on two of these celebrities - Kanye West: I don't believe that what he did was a publicity stunt. I think that he was chosen to be on that show because he had recently released the album and he used that opportunity to utter words that many people were thinking.
David - I think he is an alcoholic and even if all publicity is good publicity I don't think he would make himself look that crazy for publicity.
Maybe I shouldn't have used the word "fishy." It's not that I doubt the story. It's not hard to imagine that the Hoff has an alcohol problem or that Alec B can be an a-hole to his kids. It's that the amount of press they receive seems directly proportionate to whatever they have to have to promote. In other words, if "Knight Rider" was the last thing David had to promote then I'm sure he'd still be an alcoholic, probably worse, we just would never have seen the video!
OMG. I still hear "Schweaty Balls" over and over again in my head too...I thought it was just me.
I don't know how you can come up with these unique things to post about time and time again. I am going to think on this one. Great post.
Post a Comment